Risking Failure

What am I afraid of when confronted with the opportunity to chase a dream? I could fall on my face, face rejection, or I could succeed – leading to far more unanswered questions. It would be so much easier to not take a step. My own pride asserts that I ought to get my life together before I go further. Others are certainly more qualified.

His Glory or Mine
But waiting to move until I am confident in my own awesome ability and credentials robs God of an incredible opportunity to be glorified in my weakness. Moreover, my reluctance reveals a sinful lust for my own glory over His.

Faith Is Never Failure and Obedience Doesn’t Always Look Like Success
I could try and fail, but a step of faith and obedience is never failure, not in the eyes of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Since Jesus’ obedience led to death, I believe I can say with confidence that God’s plan does not always look like success to the world.

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(Quote by Ellen Johnson Sirleaf)

I fear obtaining my goals and finding myself unable to rise to the challenges they present. But here lies another blessed opportunity for Christ’s power to be made known in my weaknesses. Dreams that scare you are more likely going to need more than you can offer. When God comes through, there will be no stealing His glory if it is something you couldn’t do.

Believe and Trust
If this door is presently closed to me, I will trust that He will use it to teach me what I could not have known and grow me in ways I could not have grown otherwise. If it is opened, trust that He will provide for all of the uncertainties and challenges that follow.

Father, I want to trust You beyond what my eyes can see or my mind imagine. You are worthy of all my trust and faith. Lead me. There is none more skilled in guiding me. I’m sorry for worrying and trying to work things out in my own strength.  You are good. I trust You.  Amen

 

 

 the face

The Proximity of Love in the Unknown

I don’t have it all together. I’ve been having a real hard time lately. In the midst of all of the not-having-it-togetherness, God has been teaching me some pretty sweet things. For that, I am glad, and blessed. I want to share it with you, not because I am amazingly brilliant with lots to share, but just because these gifts are too sweet to keep to myself. I am sure someone else needs them too.

Jesus loves you.

A whole lot. I know, I don’t always believe it either. Even as I am typing this, I struggle to believe. Jesus loves me. Why don’t I believe? Did He not do enough to prove it to me? Was it not enough that He died to save my life, to have me near? Is it not enough that He makes the sunrise every morning? Could I imagine that my flaws and sins are stronger than the blood He shed to cover them? Could it be that my lack of loveliness is enough to ward off the strength of His immense love? No, this is not so. He is enough. His love is strong enough.

He is near.

Psalm 139:7-12

Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
    and the light become night around me,”
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you;
    the night will shine like the day,
    for darkness is as light to you.

If it were not for His great love, His nearness would be a fearful thing, but in fact, it is wonderful. It is what gives me hope and strength. His loving nearness is the power in my bones when I feel weak.

He is near and loving in the unknown.

So I am basing this section off of Oswald Chambers’ My Utmost for His Highest, August 5th, The Baffling Call of God. It presents the idea that we can be unsuccessful in the eyes of the people around us, and be unaware of the way in which God wants to use our lives, and still fully embrace The Baffling Call of God.

I have felt like a failure many times in my life. So you can imagine my relief when I read from Oswald Chambers’ My Utmost for His Highest, “Jesus Christ’s life was an absolute failure from every standpoint but God’s. But what seemed failure from man’s standpoint was tremendous triumph from God’s, because God’s purpose is never man’s purpose.”

So even if my life seems like a total failure from man’s perspective, I am in good company. Better yet, there is hope that God sees it differently.

If it isn’t obvious from the previous paragraph, I am living in the blessed land of “What Am I Doing With My Life?!” Again, I could discuss this further, but that is not my intention for this blog. Suffice it to say, I don’t know. And the unknown is scary. To quote my good ol’ friend Oswald again, “It cannot be stated definitely what the call of God is to, because His call is to be in comradeship with Himself for His own purposes, and the test is to believe that God knows what he is after.”

His purpose for me is to be in relationship with Him. He knows what He is after, and I just have to trust Him. 

“A Christian is one who trusts the wits and the wisdom of God, and not his own wits. If we have a purpose of our own, it destroys the simplicity and the leisureliness which ought to characterize the children of God.” – Oswald Chambers

Jesus, help me to trust You. To believe in Your love. To believe You are near. And to trust that You know what You are doing with my life. I love You, my Savior. I want to love You more. You are deserving of all of me. Thank You Jesus for who You are. I praise You for You are worthy of all my trust. Your love is beyond what I can comprehend, and it is real. Thank you Jesus. May my life be marked by simplicity and leisure because I trust in You.
-Amen